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A word of encouragement: Love

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Today is Valentine’s Day, and I wish all of you a day filled with live-giving, healing, transformational love. Let none of us be satisfied by the saccharine over-sweetness of infatuation or the self-serving pungeance of lust; let us only be satisfied by unconditional, pure, and abiding love.

I profess the religion of love,
Love is my religion and my faith.
My mother is love
My father is love
My prophet is love
My God is love
I am a child of love
I have come only to speak of love
– Jalaluddin Rumi

What we can learn from being sick

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The following is the full text of the February edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter. Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

I am recovering from the worst cold I’ve had in years. I’m one of those people, who, when I’m taking good care of myself, almost never gets sick. I thank my dad for those genes! But my immune system just wasn’t up to the challenge of whatever bug my husband brought home a few weeks ago.

Being sick can teach us some important lessons. In a society in which we often walk around sort of “hovering above” ourselves, sickness really brings us into our body in a new way. It’s an opportunity to pay deeper attention to our sensations and feelings, to get more in touch with our needs and be gentler with ourselves about meeting them (for example, an afternoon nap that we would chastise ourselves for normally may be a welcome friend when we’re sick).

It’s also an opportunity to allow ourselves to be cared for. Perhaps a friend runs an errand for us or picks something up for us at the drug store. Perhaps we make a visit to a doctor to make sure that clinical intervention isn’t needed. We may have to ask colleagues to take projects over at work, or family members to help us take care of children or chores. Sickness can force us to do something that most of us find very difficult: let others help us.

Sickness also reminds us of our ultimate frailty. Being human means having limitations, not being able to do everything, and certainly not always being able to do things perfectly. Sometimes when we’re well we can forget that, and we push ourselves to achieve beyond what is reasonable to expect of ourselves; sickness has a humbling quality that reminds us that ultimately, we do have limitations.

These are some beautiful gifts that sickness brings to us, whether it’s a temporary cold or a chronic illness. There is freedom in acknowledging that we can’t “do it all.” When we learn to set aside our pride to ask for help, when we learn to set reasonable goals for ourselves, when we learn to deeply listen to our bodies about what we need, there is freedom to simply be ourselves. And that is a beautiful thing, since we may not be superwomen or supermen, each one of us is a precious creation, fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139)!

My hope for myself, and for you, is that we can remember the lessons that sickness teaches us, and live by them daily, even if/when we get well.

Sermon: The Word of God

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This sermon was preached originally on January 3rd, 2010, at All Pilgrims Christian Church. I preached an updated version of it on January 2nd, 2011, at Magnolia United Methodist Church. The manuscript is from the 2010 worship service, and the audio is from the 2011 worship service. As usual, I recommend listening if you are able, because vocal tone and inflection is important in the preaching event.

Audio: Word of God; January 2011 Sermon by Katie Stickney

The Word of God

Text: John 1:1-18

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God.  All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being. What has come into being in him was life, and the life was the light of all people. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not overcome it.

These are the first words of the gospel of John, the only gospel that starts out with such cosmological, poetic language.  The other three gospels, Matthew, Mark, and Luke, tell the story of Jesus’ life in much more down-to-earth ways.  These gospels begin with stories of people doing things in the world.  Some talk about Mary’s pregnancy, Jesus’ birth and early days, others include lists of Jesus’ ancestors.  John begins with the cosmological language: In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

If these words have a familiar ring to you, it’s probably because they also begin the first book of the Scriptures—the book of Genesis.  Genesis chapter one, verse one, begins: “In the beginning when God created the heavens and the earth…” and the passage goes on to describe what God did each day of the first seven “days” of creation.  Genesis starts out by saying that in the beginning God created. In the beginning, God existed. In the beginning, God simply was. John, who is attempting in this gospel reading to convey to the hearer who Jesus was, refers back to the early language of Genesis.  For John believes that Jesus, being God’s son and being God himself, was always with God.  John’s claim here is that the person of Christ existed always, not only during the life of the man we know as Jesus.  That Christ was present back in that creation story recorded in Genesis, and even that everything came into being through him.  John says: All things came into being through him, and without him not one thing came into being.

All of the gospels tell us about the life, ministry, and love of the man Jesus.  John in particular focuses on the divine nature of Jesus, on the belief that Jesus was himself fully God.  Church tradition tells us that Jesus was simultaneously fully human and fully God.  Frankly, in some of the other gospels, one might not even get the “fully God” part of that.  It is in this book of John where the “fully God” part of Jesus’ nature is really expressed.  This is who John believes that Jesus is—fully one with God in heaven, fully divine, but emptying himself of part of his divinity for a period of time to come and dwell among us on earth.

And the Word became flesh and lived among us, and we have seen his glory, the glory as of a father’s only son, full of grace and truth.  This part of the passage would have been the most shocking to the original hearers of this message.  In those days, that which was of the spirit and that which was of the body were sharply divided.  “flesh” was the term used to describe that which was of the body, and it signaled by definition that which was devoid of God.  In this category folks would put our desires, our sexuality, our hungers, and our sin.  One of the primary tasks of the religious folks of this time was to try to rise above “the flesh” and be spiritual, which was synonymous with being loving, self-denying, and holy.  To say that God’s Son, the Christ, took on the flesh was quite a radical thing to say.  In that sense, John was disagreeing with folks who want to make this sharp distinction between the flesh and the spiritual.  No, John is saying, the flesh is not something that we should try to run away from!  Jesus himself came to us in the flesh so that we could better understand God’s love for us.

Better understanding God’s love for us was the primary purpose of Jesus coming to us.  This is why Jesus here is referred to as the Word.  Jesus’ presence with us was a way for God to communicate with us that God loves us.  The Greek word used for “Word” here is logos which could be translated in many ways, including simply “word,” or speech, discourse, language, thought, reason, message, account, document, or book.  All of these involve communication.  All of them involve trying to convey a message from one person to another.   Jesus is the Word of God and that word is Love!

Jesus demonstrated love to the people he was with.  He unconditionally accepted and loved everyone around him, even when they abandoned or betrayed him, even when they were caught in sin.  He even asked God to forgive those who crucified him!  But his life wasn’t the only way that Jesus demonstrated God’s love for us.  Just coming at all was a demonstration of this love.  If Jesus was truly with God, and was God, always, then choosing to come to earth in the flesh was a choice Jesus made to limit himself.  There is a term for this, which theologians like to use, called kenosis.  Kenosis is the Greek word for emptiness and when used to describe Christ it means that he emptied himself of certain aspects of his divine nature in order to assume a human nature.   By definition God is infinite—we can’t pin God down with language or images, because whatever we use to describe God, God is always so much more than that.  By choosing to reveal Godself in a human form, God had to give up some of the infinite nature.

There are three things we need to address here in talking about Jesus emptying himself and coming to us in human form.

First, what I am describing to you here is one way of understanding the person of Jesus, and not necessarily every Christian believes these exact things.  You don’t have to believe or agree with everything I’m saying here.  In fact, what’s important is not so much whether this is all exactly how it happened or not, but rather the important thing is the truth this story conveys about the deep and unconditional love that God has for all of us.  This story has been with us for centuries, that God became limited so that God could communicate God’s love to us.

Second, this isn’t just a pretty story.  Jesus’ choice to empty himself of some of his infinite nature, some of his divine power, was not just in being alive as a human man but also in dying a human death because the “powers that be” in his culture were not able or willing to accept the truth of his message.  The love Jesus demonstrated here is not just a warm fuzzy feeling.  It is truly a love which is willing to experience hardship, sorrow, and pain in order for others to find ways of truly living.  As John describes it, Jesus was the light shining in the darkness, and the darkness had not overcome the light—we know that, because we know that Christ is still alive and with us today.  And yet Christ also did not eradicate darkness.  There are still many ways we all experience darkness in our lives, and it can often be very difficult to accept the message of God’s love for us—not only because it is often hard to feel worthy of that love, but also because that love often challenges us in our comfortable places, to go out and do things that are scary or painful.  The kind of love that Jesus demonstrates is the kind of love that comforts the afflicted and afflicts the comfortable… but most of us here in this room have some areas where we are afflicted and some areas where we are comfortable.  God’s love is there to comfort us in areas where we are experiencing oppression and pain… but God’s love also challenges us in areas where we have gotten too comfortable or experience too much privilege.  The reward, though, of accepting and responding to this healing and challenging love is that we become children of God, adopted into a heavenly family that is full to the brim of the unconditional love that all of us seek.

Third, it is important to answer the question: Why would God have to be limited to communicate God’s love in the first place?  Why must there be a Word at all?

The answer to this question is simply that we are finite, embodied creatures.  We have bodies that have clear boundaries.  We exist in this form for only a short and finite period of time.  We do have sparks of the divine in us; the Holy Spirit dwells within us, but we also experience the world in embodied ways, through touching, hearing, tasting, and seeing.  Because we ourselves are embodied, we can only experience God in embodied ways.    Thus God came to us in the person of Jesus as a human being that we could touch, see, and hear.  While Jesus could not stay alive foreve in human form, his words were written down for future generations—that’s us!—to have something tangible to pick up and read (pick up Bible if possible).

Jesus isn’t the only Word of God.  Sometimes we refer to the Bible as the Word of God.  We don’t mean that the Bible contains the literal words of God, we mean that just as Jesus was a physical embodiment of God’s love, so too is the Bible.  The Bible is the Word of God insofar as it provides an experience of the living God and God’s love for us.  And the Word of God can be communicated through all sorts of other ways too!  You don’t often hear it in these terms, but truly, wherever we encounter an embodiment of God’s love, something that stirs us change our lives for the better, to help those in need of help, to be more loving, to seek justice, that is also a Word of God.  That means that music can be a Word of God.  A book, whether it’s written by a Christian author or not, can be a Word of God.  A website, a blog, a text message, a phone call can all be Words of God.  The beauty of creation in the changing color of the leaves can be a Word of God.  A pet that provides us comfort and companionship when we are lonely can be a Word of God.

And the coolest part is that this means that WE too can be Words of God for each other!  I had a professor in seminary, Fr. Keith Brehob, who said, “Each of you is a sacred Word of God, spoken only once.”   God spoke each of you into existence, with unique gifts, talents, and passions, and only you can love the world in the unique way that God made you to love the world.  As we enter a time of silence I invite you to think about what specific ways God may be calling you to speak God’s love into the world right now.  You are a sacred Word of God, and you have been created to speak God’s Word of love into the world.

Kindness towards our bodies in the new year

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The following is the full text of the January edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter.  Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

Did you make new years resolutions this year?  I made two.  One was to be more intentional about journaling.  The other, much more difficult and important, is that I have resolved to be kind to myself, and the most difficult aspect of that, for me and for many of us, is to be kind to my body.  After all, this is a time when we are bombarded with advertisements for diet plans and gyms, we are reminded of our “overindulgences” of holiday food and drink, and we are told that there is something inherently flawed or deficient about our bodies that needs changing.  It’s a powerful cultural message, and I believe each and every one of us, to one degree or another, has internalized it.

So I’m here to propose a different way, a better way, a freer way.  How about, instead of holding our bodies up to an external standard, we learn to trust and listen to our bodies?  It is in this way that we can truly be kind to our bodies and our selves.  Instead of trying to fit the size and shape of our bodies into a culturally defined (and thus external) norm, what if we accept the size and shape of our body, as it is now… no ifs, ands, or buts?  What if, instead of adhering to rigid (again, external) diet plans, we learn to trust our body’s hunger cues to tell us what and when we need to eat?  What if we found ways to play and dance and enjoy the way our bodies can move and work, instead of forcing ourselves into external expectations about going to the gym X times per week, or spending X hours a day “exercising”?

What I’m proposing is a radical idea: to make peace with our bodies.  Peace, after all, is a radical proposition in any form.  At Christmas we talked about Jesus being the Prince of Peace.  Often, that word “peace” gets watered down to mean something closer to “niceness,” an artificial politeness rather than the kind of radical trust and vulnerability that is required for true peace between peoples.  If we all took the charge for peace seriously, we would have to face the reality that peace is political.  It means no more war.  It means no more oppression.  It means no more divide between rich and poor.  This is the fundamental message of the Christ, who showed us how to live in peace with one another.  It is a charge that we Christians today are not living up to very well.

But even if we wanted to live up to this charge of peace better, how could we ever get there if we’re not even at peace with our own bodies?  If our mind and our body are not integrated, not working in tandem, without kindness and trust, there is no peace within us.  And if there is no peace within us, then how can we be at peace with others?  How can we seek peace in the world?  So yes, what I am calling us to is radical.  I’m calling us to radical kindness, trust, acceptance, and love of our own bodies, for that first step is the only way that we can ever begin to find that same radical kindness, trust, acceptance, and love of our neighbors next door and all over the globe.

Are you an optimist or a pessimist?

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When I was a child my family would often talk about other family members in terms of them being optimists or pessimists.  According to my family, being an optimist was better than being a pessimist.  The idea was that pessimists were unnecessarily negative, expecting the worst, and not enjoying life.  Optimists made the best of things, worked hard and found ways to be happy with their lot in life.

Eventually, I grew up, and as usually happens when folks grow up, I began to question these ideas.  It began to make less and less sense to box people into one category or the other, and both seemed to have obvious pros and cons to me.  So when I stumbled across this cute cartoon, I knew I just had to share it with you:

I like this because it stretches us beyond the optimist/pessimist dichotomy, and anything that stretches us beyond rigid binary thinking is a good thing.

Do you have any rigid beliefs that could use a little gentle stretching?

An early-arriving Christmas may bring us joy or pain

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The following is the full text of the December edition of my monthly column, Tea & Empathy, in the Redmond UMC Newsletter.  Click here to go to the RUMC website to download the newsletter.

This year, two radio stations (106.9 and 95.7) both started playing Christmas music at midnight on Saturday, November 13th. Years ago, 106.9 played Christmas music the weekend after Thanksgiving, which turned into Thanksgiving day, then the weekend before Thanksgiving, and this year the weekend before that. So, if it seems to you like Christmas is coming earlier and earlier every year… well, you are right!

Some of you are excited about that; I know because I have seen the twinkle in your eyes as you talk about Christmas coming and I have seen your Facebook statuses celebrating the arrival of Christmas music on the radio. But some of you are less than excited about it. You may be concerned that by the time Christmas actually comes, you will be tired of Christmas. Or perhaps you are a theological pedant and insist that we are in advent; Christmas does not come until midnight the 25th!

I have been in each of these positions over the years. Some years I’ve been way too excited about Christmas to wait, while other years I’ve wished that culture could hold off a bit. This year, what strikes me is that perhaps we are all in need of a bit of a lift.

Let’s face it, RUMC. We’ve been in an economic recession for two years. Money is still tight for many of us; and for some of us we are out of work or worried about lay-offs. On top of that, many of us have been dealing with illnesses and the loss of loved ones. For some of us, maybe we just need to have a reason to celebrate.

Christmas music may give us a new spring in our step. The thought of children ripping paper off of presents with delightful anticipation may bring a smile to our face. Sometimes seeing the twinkling lights and hearing jingle bells warms and soothes our heart. And if that brings you the hope, joy, love, and peace that we celebrate throughout advent, then I say this is a good thing.

I also want to recognize that for some of us, the holidays may bring the opposite feelings of what I’ve just described. Some of us may feel anxiety about gift-giving with finances being tight, others of us might feel the pain of missing a loved one who is far away or has passed away. If you find yourself in this position, please know that you are supported and prayed for by your church family. Don’t hesitate to share your prayer requests with us. And if you need someone confidential to talk to, my door is always open.

Bottom line: do what you need to do this holiday season to be as happy and safe as you need to be, and let’s all collectively decide not to worry about what anyone else thinks!

A word of encouragement: Gratitude

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We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.  ~Thornton Wilde

As Thanksgiving approaches, I am mindful of all that I am grateful for.  As I ask myself who and what my treasures are, I see the faces of loved ones, I remember the support of my colleagues and mentors, and I think of the small and large delights of living that I savor every day. I think the following image illustrates my treasures pretty well:

pi symbol written on a piece of pumpkin pie with whipped cream

It was my sister Kim who used whip cream to put “pi” on the pie, my sister Kristine who snapped the photo (low res, because it was a cell phone several years ago) and the rest of us joined in at laughing at their antics.

Delicious food and laughing with my family, now those are some of my dearest treasures.

What are your treasures?

Let’s all practice a heart-consciousness of our treasures during this season of gratitude.

And enjoy the pie!